All Around Me
by hallucinogeniccrush
Summary: When Rachel Berry has nothing, who can help her feel like something again? Rated M for adult themes, eating disorders, self harm and future sexual situations.
1. The Last time

'_Rachel Berry, you are a freak.'_

The words ran through her mind as she stood in front of the mirror, in what had become her nightly routine.

'_No one will ever want you.'_

She shook her head, tears stinging her eyes, threatening to fall.

'_You have no talent.'_

She shook her head again, more vigorously this time. She reached into the black box on her dresser and pulled out the silver blade. It shone in the moonlight flooding through her bedroom window.

'This is the only way.' She murmured.

She pressed the blade to her skin, wincing slightly as she reopened old cuts. There was no use pretending anymore. She was worth nothing; each time she pressed the blade to her tanned skin it validated the line of insults running through her head. It punished her for being the way that she was. Not good enough.

She began to feel light headed, watching the blood trail down her body. she felt weightless, high...perfect, though only for a moment. She ignored all else, falling to the ground and letting her eyes droop heavily.

Only one name went through her mind before everything went black, and her eyes fluttered closed.

_Quinn Fabray._


	2. Late

A/N Thank you guys for all the nice reviews! This isn't my first time writing fan fiction, but it is my first glee fan fiction, so all reviews are appreciated :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any of it's characters.

Three months earlier

'Ain't nothing gonna break my stride...'

Rachel Berry stirred to the sound of the alarm beside her bed.

'Ugh, is it that time already?'

Usually one for strict routines and determination, this morning Rachel couldn't care less. She reached over and pressed snooze on the alarm, before turning over and falling back to sleep.

Today wasn't just another day. It was only a few weeks until New Directions performed at Sectionals, and as much as this excited her, it also made her incredibly nervous. She wouldn't admit this to anyone, but lately she had been feeling doubtful that they could take a second consecutive Sectionals title. Especially looking at their new competition, the Dalton Warblers. The very same team that Kurt had moved to not that long ago, in fact. Another thing that she would never admit was that she had seen Kurt as her only competition in New Directions; without him, she didn't feel as though she were challenged in Glee club. And not being challenged was something that Rachel Barbra Berry could not stand.

Two hours later, she awoke to the sound of her father, Hiram, knocking on her door.

"Rachel, honey? Are you awake?" He asked, tapping the door gently. She sat up in bed quickly, picking up her phone and checking the time.

'Eight o'clock already?' She thought, and then motioned for her father to come in.

"Honey, it's eight o'clock. Don't you need to leave for school in fifteen minutes?" Hiram asked, walking into her bedroom with a look of clear confusion on his face. Rachel nodded, climbing out of bed and pulling the covers down into place.

"I know, Daddy." Rachel replied. "I guess that I just lost track of time!"

Hiram shook his head, pulling Rachel into his arms and kissing her on the forehead. "Okay. Well Dad and I are leaving for work in about five minutes, but I'll leave the car keys on the kitchen bench for you."

Rachel smiled, hugging her father briefly. He returned the smile and left her room, shutting the door behind him. Rachel quickly ran into her ensuite, turning on the shower and removing her clothes.

'This is going to be a long day...'

Running from her car into McKinley, Rachel prayed that she wouldn't be late for Homeroom. She was never late; she had a 100% attendance record, and she wasn't about to tarnish it now. She didn't know what had gotten into her, but she was sure that today was going to be a bad day. She could feel it. Just as she turned into the hall before her classroom, she felt icy liquid hit her body, shocking her system.

'Shit' She thought, licking her lips while looking up to see her perpetrator. She didn't have time for this, and was just about to let them know when - Quinn Fabray stood in front of her. For some reason that she couldn't explain, Rachel felt butterflies in her stomach. It had been that way lately when she saw Quinn, and she had no idea why. By all accounts, she should hate Quinn. Quinn Fabray was everything that Rachel couldn't stand; popular, HBIC, a cheerleader, a bitch to anyone who didn't fit in. Like her.

She felt the slushie continue to make it's way down her argyle sweater and quickly started wiping the liquid from her eyes, before glaring at Quinn and walking into homeroom. She didn't even have time to get changed this time.

She was going to get Quinn back, and figure this out once and for all.


	3. Intoxicating eyes

Rachel walked into her homeroom class, drenched with purple icy liquid.

"Rachel, is there any reason why you're late?" Will Schuester began, then, catching sight of the small girl's drenched form, simply nodded sadly. Rachel, though talented, was not well liked at McKinley. She was one of his best students, and though he'd never admit it, he had a soft spot for the diva. Rachel walked up to him expectantly, holding out her hand for a detention slip. He shook his head. "You can go to the bathroom, then directly to first period, if you'd like." He said softly. "I'll mark you as present." Rachel's bottom lip quivered, as she nodded in reply. "Thanks, Mr. Schue." She said gratefully, straightening up her form, and walking out the door as though she were Queen of McKinley High.

Rachel wasn't Queen of McKinley though, she thought as she walked to the girl's bathroom. She wasn't even close. The girl who held that title was the very girl who had slushied her that morning. Quinn Fabray. Just saying the name in her head made her spine tingle inexplicably. She should hate Quinn; after all, Quinn had been terrorizing her for years now. As she dried her hair and reapplied her makeup, she heard footsteps behind her. Turning around, she saw none other than the HBIC herself, Quinn. "If you're here to slushie me again, could you let me move my clean clothes out of the way first?" Rachel asked, teeth clenched. Quinn smirked, making her way over to the diva. "Funnily enough, Rachel, my life doesn't revolve around making your life a living hell." Quinn replied, fixing her ponytail. "But it is a nice extracurricular activity." A dab of lip gloss, a flip of her pony tail, and Quinn left as quickly as she came in, leaving Rachel with nothing but astonishment.

'_She called me Rachel.'_

Later in the day, Rachel made her way into Glee. Miraculously, she hadn't been slushied for the rest of the day, so she was in a good mood. Such a good mood, that she walked into the classroom with her head in the clouds, and sat in the first free seat that she saw, unaware of who was sitting next to it. A clearing throat next to her and the smell of Chanel perfume pushed her out of her thoughts, prompting her to turn to her left. "Did you lose your mind?" Quinn asked, simply. Rachel stared at her, trying to think of a witty comeback, but came up blank. As she stared, she looked into Quinn's eyes. They were a beautiful hazel-green, deep and intoxicating. Between that and the smell of her perfume, Rachel was trapped in a daydream, expressionless as Quinn back. Quinn noticed Rachel staring into her eyes, and took the chance to look into the diva's. They were a dark brown, and Quinn had never truly looked into them before. They were, dare she say it, beautiful. Wait, what was she thinking. Rachel was annoying, selfish, and bossy. Nothing about her could be beautiful. Though it seemed that maybe she had found something that was. "Alright, Rachel, you can stay." She shrugged, turning to face Mr. Schue. Rachel was awestruck; as yet again, Quinn seemed to be treating her like a human being.

'_I have to figure her out.'_


End file.
